
Photo of the author and her then 5-month old son
I won’t go into the old news that is Time’s controversial “mom enough” mid-May issue. We all know they sold enough copies on that matter.
Instead, I wanted to share some views on attachment parenting and breastfeeding expressed by fellow Filipino moms.
To begin, let me say that I am a babywearing, formerly nursing mom (my son recently weaned after being breastfed for two years and six months). In fact, here’s a photo of me a year and a half ago, when my son was just five months old.
Here in the Philippines, we are not new to the concept of babywearing and breastfeeding.
Velvet Escario‐Roxas, a breastfeeding counselor and representative of Arugaan (ah-roo-ga-an), a non-governmental, WHO-funded organization that conducts breastfeeding training for the Philippine Department of Health, gave a good picture of this when she posted a recent Facebook status update on the fan page of the popular breastfeeding blog, Chronicles of a Nursing Mom:
“Our Pinoy [colloquialism for "Filipino] ancestors have been doing these things since the beginning of time. We call it the Filipino way of living or raising of children. They on the other hand modernized it and called it attachment parenting. Look at the indigenous folks of the mountain provinces. Read more…
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I want you to meet three women I know.
Mother A is a business woman, well into her thirties, who was bottle fed as a baby. She is a health nut who definitely wants her baby to get breastmilk, but doesn’t want to be tied down by the breast, so she hopes to do be able to do as much pumping as possible and to deliver the milk via bottle much of the time.
Mother B is an older woman who has finally conceived a long-awaited child with the help of a lot of scientific intervention. She has dreamed of being a mother for a long time, and wants to overcome her difficult childhood by showing her child the kind of unconditional love and care that she never received Read more…
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This topic may be taboo in some cultures, but I’m part French, and nothing is more important to the French then l’amour (although food and wine are very close contenders)!
I recently read an article somewhere that said many moms polled were having sex (I should say moms who are married or in a committed relationship) about 4 times a year… and they were ok with that, as were their partners. Once a quarter? Really!? I know we are all exhausted by the time we get to bed, but isn’t it important for your and your partner’s happiness? Isn’t it important for the health and well-being of your relationship with your significant other to be intimate? Read more…
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On Monday I am told, “you need to go to Paris for 3 days next week.” I say “OK”, but think, “How can I pull that one-off? I am still nursing!”.
So I go into action, first calling my mother (who happens to be French, has a large family that live in Paris…and who is the primary caregiver during the day while I am at work), and then I start looking up plane tickets and hotels. The only way for me to be able to go on this business trip is to take the baby, and therefore, I need to take my mother to care for her while I am at work.
In turn, I need to take my 4-year-old son as well, since he would be otherwise left without a caretaker while we are away. Tickets are bought, hotel reservations made (which is a process on its own, since I need is a place with a kitchen, so that we can prepare food for the kids and are not forced to eat every meal out), bags are packed, and we are off! Read more…
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My baby’s turned 1… I should say my last baby’s turned one.
I only have 2, but will not attempt to have any more after this. Making the decision of having the first 2 was very difficult for me, since there are some genetic issues at play in my family.
I told my then fiancée, while we were discussing future family plans, to be prepared to adopt, that I will probably not have my own children.
I had prepared for that my entire life and was sure that I would never carry and give birth to my own child. After running tests and having discussions with geneticists, we decided to tempt fate and ‘go for it’ — attempt to have our own, and hope for the best. I had an amnio, monthly and then weekly ultrasounds. Read more…
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How do you gain your children’s trust …how do you keep that trust?
Years ago, while working in a busy hostel, I met a young woman who was addicted to crack cocaine. Amira was 2 years old, and Iman was 4. I was a young mom, who knew little about everything, but wanted to save the world.
I was very afraid for her son, A, who was 6 months old at the time, a little sweetheart with two little teeth that flashed when he smiled up at me for the first time from his stroller.
In my chosen field (of work), words like crack, HIV, suicide, poverty, and prostitution were repeated so many times, that it became something that we took for granted. What wasn’t mentioned and discussed was that there were “mothers” who were in this situation. Mothers who were going through all of these things with their children watching on. Read more…
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