In our house we eat simply: mostly fresh fruit and veges, some dairy, nuts most days, pasture raised meat and a few grains. The boys drink water or milk and rarely sodas or fruit-juice. We don’t tend to have packet foods, but I bake a few muffins and we have ice-cream and chocolate as treat-foods. The children who visit us mostly come from homes who eat in a similar way, so food for our guests hasn’t ever been a problem.
The few children who have come and are used to trash food have the simple option of eating or not. I never make a big deal out of it and they never go hungry. Read more…
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When I became a mother, I expected the sleepless nights. I expected that breastfeeding might not always be fun. I expected that my body might temporarily (for ten years or so) look like a bag of laundry. I expected that I would have to be more organised than I had ever been in my life.
I did not expect the emotional intensity of mothering. I had no concept of what it felt like to have all of my emotions sucked from me – leaving me dry as a prune and in need of ‘plumping’.
I had no idea that all of my baggage – the stuff I had managed to keep suppressed or hidden under my social-shell would be brought to the surface and pushed into my face.
When *that * happened I had a choice – to ignore it all and push it all back down, (hopefully) never to be seen again – or to ride those emotional waves, like I rode the waves of pain with each contraction when giving birth.
Initially, I tried to ignore it. Eventually, I chose to ride the waves and to let each emotion swamp me. It wasn’t pretty. My emotional state at any one time was well reflected in my outer world. I put on 20kg (44lbs). I caught every cold and vomiting bug, and I regularly had mouth ulcers and cold-sores. I walked hunched over. My clothes were often shabby or stained from my knickers to my coat. The house was in constant disarray. And, I did a lot of crying. Read more…
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Call it Mummy amnesia, but I’m certain that our older two children were, well, older when they began to insist on doing things “myself.”
Our lovely Mr Butterfly is the grand old age of two and has insisted on doing things himself for a few months now. Once again I am faced with the mixed emotions of delight (that he wants to do things for himself and often can) and horror (at the things he wants to attempt).
Climbing has been a regular fixture in our family. Mr Hare (nine) spends a good portion of his life a-top tall trees, and Mr Owl was months old when he began climbing chairs to get on to the top of the dining table. I have strategies (mostly involving selected blindness and deep breathing) for dealing with the climbing.
It’s been a long time since we’ve fed Mr Butterfly, and cleaning up the mess beneath his chair, on his chair, beside his chair, on the front of the table, the side of the table and the top of the table, are simply part of my regular after meal routine. We have plasters and hugs a plenty, so in our house small people using scissors and knives is really no big deal. Read more…
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When Germaine Greer wrote The Female Eunuch, at the height of The Feminist Revolution, she suggested that motherhood should not be considered a substitute to a career. By the time she wrote The Whole Woman in 1999, she had done a complete 180 degree turn and called for proper state-funding for Stay at Home Mums.
She realised full-time mothering is as valuable to many women as being in paid work. She also realised there were benefits to society as a whole.
Children who feel well attached to their mothers do better at life. They make better decisions; they chose more mature friends and partners, and their relationships are more likely to last; they have a work ethic which is balanced with a sense of play; they are physically healthier and they have a stronger sense of community. And becoming properly attached takes intense commitment from one main carer for a long time. Read more…
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Where in the world do you live?
I live in Napier, on the sunny east coast of the North Island of New Zealand. After a major (7.8) earthquake in 1931 the centre of Napier was rebuilt in the styles of Art Deco and Art Nouveau and has become something of a tourist destination. http://www.artdeconapier.com/
There are plenty of wineries around too.
http://www.hawkesbaynz.com/Visit/Wine–Food/
(Come in February – the kids are back in school and the weather is warm and settled.)
And, are you from there?
I grew up in a country area called Tutira, 50km north of the city, on a sheep farm that my Dad managed. There were 75 kids in the school and 9 in my year group. I had to go to weekly boarding school, here in Napier, for my high-school years from the age of 12. Read more…
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This started as a post about what happens when a mother gets ill, but still has a young family to care for. While we were busy doing research with a very nasty tummy-bug, Veronica published her post on taking her daughter to watch a game of college basketball, (NEW JERSEY, USA: Ladies of the Court).
It’s a lovely post about parents sharing their common passion with their child. The comments were great and they got me thinking – are our children genetically different to others? You see, during those few days when various ones of us were ill, the boys got to watch tv. This doesn’t happen in our house. Our kids aren’t allowed any electronic entertainment.
Before you jump to the conclusion that we are controlling hippy-freaks, let me reassure you that we have no electronic entertainment (for children) in our house for very good reasons. In fact, many years ago our eldest son was pretty much on a par with most other children of educated middle-class families. He watched educational tv and dvds every day, and he listened to loads of cds. He’d been to see The Wiggles on stage and a couple of other shows.
Then, a teacher suggested that a few of the behaviour problems we were having at the time might be due to over-stimulation. Read more…
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